jessica craddock's Story
i have club feetI hate being apart of my family .I know that they are not perfect ,but I feel like they are because nothing is wrong with their foot. I ask myself over and over why did it had to happen to me. Every day I wish it would of happen to them instead of me.Because of my foot I have so many fears of not finding a boyfriend
because of my foot. I am really struggling with acepting myself. Because iI am the only one in my family with it I always felt like Iwas curse.I just want to feel good abot myself without being insecure and feeling like no guy would want me. I think I am a good and nice person ,but I get angry with my family because they don't have this problem, so they will never undetstand.I might as well be talking to a tree.
I need help in controlling my emotions so I wont get deprresed, angry ,and jealous.Since I can't talk to my family about how I feel I started keeping a diary about my feelings, some of it good ,some bad . I know it's wrong for me to feel this way,but I don't want to deny it. I feel alone even though I know I am not.
The only person who can relate is people who have the same condition as you.I am very happy I found this website. Reading other people stories encourage me to keep on going. Thank for reading my story and I will contine to pray for myself and others. And just like my pastor always say WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER And if you have any sugetion on how I can control my emotions and acept myself more I would surely appreciate it.
Added on 10 Jun 2010
Comments
All times are in GMT +00:00Comment added by Abi on the Wed 5 October 2011 a 08:48pm
hi i am 17 year old boy having club foot.i love myself . i look at the good things that i have and not look at the bad things.it is human nature to look at what we dont have believe me the non-clubfooters never even notice their legs like we do . they are worried of their own problems and what they don't have.i'm much better off than most of those with normal leg because i have realised the value of things better than them.
Comment added by Claire on the Sat 3 September 2011 a 03:23pm
For Barb...I was born with club foot too. There was talk of ankle fusion when i was 17 but I was deemed not to need it yet. I know you're a lot older than that (Im 30 now myself by the way) and I',m sure you've tried it but if you get some really good specially made ortodics for your shoes it makes the world of difference to the pain, particularly if you're active. Happy to mail if you want.
Comment added by Mayra on the Wed 1 June 2011 a 06:20pm
I can relate to you girls as well. As a little girl I never felt insecure about wearing skirts or shorts but as I got older things changed. I felt guys would be looking at me and if they saw my leg they would be turned off. I have never had a boyfriend and feel like a never will because of my foot. I try to stay away from outings that require me to show my legs such as the beach and therefore I feel like my social life is being affected. I also feel jealous of my other sisters who weren't born with this defect because they can wear pretty dresses with sandals while I'm stuck wearing long dresses or pants. Although my brother was born with club feet I feel like it's easier for him since there's no need for him to show his legs and since they are the same size, people hardly notice. However, on me my right leg's muscle is thicker than the muscle on my left leg. At times, I feel depressed but I try to keep busy so I don't think about it. I know God made me this way for a reason and until I learn to love my whole self I know it will be hard for me to love another. I have been looking into several surgeries such as calf augmentations that can help correct the outer appearance of my muscle but as of now they don't do that type of surgery in my state. Until then, I am just going to live the way I was meant to live...happy. Thank you all for your stories, it lets me know I am not alone.
Comment added by Barb on the Sat 7 May 2011 a 11:02pm
I am 47 years and about 3 weeks ago I found out that I was born with a club foot. It was confirmed by 2 different doctors, not my mother who knew all these years. She swore she told me this information. If I knew all these years it would have explained the foot pain that I have had since my teen years. It would explain why I never could find fashionable shoes to wear. I have done a lot of research in the past several weeks after I found out. The doctor wants to do an ankle fusion. The thought of being in a cast for 6 weeks, and no weight bearing activities has made me anxious. The doctor gave me a shot of cortisone to ease the pain, and that lasted for about 2 weeks. The hardest part has been dealing with the news that was kept from me all these years. I am hurt, angry, confused. Was my mother ashamed? I never understood why my 2 sisters could always wear any shoes they wanted. They were born perfect and I was jealous and didn't know why. All these years of not understanding and now I know. I am just glad to know that there are others out there that have been dealing with the same things. The fact that since I was a teenager, and I had difficulty in gym class and my mother never listened to my complaints and she could have done something about it and never did. It's nice to find this website. Thank goodness for the internet.
Comment added by Brooke on the Sun 3 April 2011 a 04:51pm
reading these stories really helped me to feel less insacure about my feet, knowing that there are other girls just like me that think and feel the way i do. i just feel so left out of things i want to do at school and out of school like trips and vacations i hate thte way my feet are so much its hard for me to run and it stresses me out how teachers dont understand the way and hurts that club feet give you but i really loved all these stories alot all you girls are wonderful! and beautiful in our own way (:
Comment added by Jeanie on the Mon 15 November 2010 a 07:28pm
Hi everyone I have a club foot and sometimes I feel down and out The reason why is bc I wish I could wear shoes and have the strength on my left foot that I have on my right foot. I'm also over weight and want to start working out.. Ughh it's So hard bc I do fine the first day but then I can't continue bc the pain is to much on my left club foot I get so mad and I want to cry. Don't get me wrong I love my life and god bless me with a husband who love me and 3 beautiful kids but just sometime it get to me.. But enough about me girl you will find someone who will love you the way you are.. Thats what make you the person you are today and I the guy has a problem with it then you don't need to be with them drop him.. Hope I help a little keep in touch really would like someone to chat with with club foot :)
Comment added by Kendra on the Tue 9 November 2010 a 04:47pm
Hang in there girls! I'm 27 and was born with club feet. (Both of them) I never wanted to wear shorts, skirts/dresses, bathing suits or sandals because I was so embarrassed about my legs and feet. I've had 4 surgeries, one of which was to break my tibia (bone in lower leg) and turn it so that my toes no longer pointed in. Problem with that was they turned too far, so now I have toes that point in one direction and my knee in another. It looks quite strange, and like I said I was extremely embarrassed about it for many years. When my husband and I first started dating I tried to hid my legs and feet from him, until eventually one day he told me that he loved me, ALL of me and kissed my crooked little feet. And still to this day I can't stand anyone touching my scars (including myself!) except for when my husband gives me a foot rub. So hang in there, the right guy will come along!
Comment added by Meagan on the Tue 28 September 2010 a 03:29pm
I was born with a club foot of course like you guys and currently am 17 with a boyfriend. I used to be depressed about my right calf muscle being smaller than my left and all the visible scars. I look at perfect legs everyday bc I have two older sisters who escaped this birth defect. I was truly self conscious until I started going to church with a bunch of outgoing people who could care less about how my leg looks. You always need to remind yourself it could be worse. My advice for you girls is to not worry about how your leg looks and what everyone else thinks bc you're stuck with it the rest of your life and people should like you for you. We cannot help the fact that we have a club foot. I promise all of you that it gets better and you will find your special someone. Most people don't notice mine until I point it out or they just stare hard. I eventually got use to the fact that I'll never have those "perfect legs" but my leg makes me who I am today.
Comment added by Meagan on the Tue 28 September 2010 a 03:28pm
I was born with a club foot of course like you guys and currently am 17 with a boyfriend. I used to be depressed about my right calf muscle being smaller than my left and all the visible scars. I look at perfect legs everyday bc I have two older sisters who escaped this birth defect. I was truly self conscious until I started going to church with a bunch of outgoing people who could care less about how my leg looks. You always need to remind yourself it could be worse. My advice for you girls is to not worry about how your leg looks and what everyone else thinks bc you're stuck with it the rest of your life and people should like you for you. We cannot help the fact that we have a club foot. I promise all of you that it gets better and you will find your special someone. Most people don't notice mine until I point it out or they just stare hard. I eventually got use to the fact that I'll never have those "perfect legs" but my leg makes me who I am today.
Comment added by Ryan on the Mon 13 September 2010 a 01:16am
I know exactly how you feel (despite my name, I am a girl ^_^). I'm 18 and I've let this hinder me so much. It was torture having to take swimmimg in high school for two years (it was mandatory for us). There were people who would stare. We would go on vacation and I would feel so selfconcious getting in the pool or swimming at the beach in fear of eyes aiming at my feet. I've always envied my sisters and my mom when it came to shoes. All the shoes I wished to wear they wore while I'm stuck in K-swiss and crocs. When it comes to boys, I have the same fear. I never put myself out there to guys because I'm affraid of them not accepting it. But I still have high hopes of finding that speacial guy who will accept me for me.
Comment added by Elinor on the Sat 14 August 2010 a 02:15pm
Girls, growing up I felt just like you, but please do not get so down, once puberty ends your foot will develop better, life in shoes will be hell but with a paid job you will be able to afford better fitting more comfy shoes and you will I promise you have a boyfriend... dress up your top half, your eyes... if you pay attention to your feet so will he... what I don't like is how ppl think I am complaining when I seriously can't stand for longer than 5mins without feeling like Im going to faint, but chin up, look up at those stars... we are beautiful xxxx
Comment added by Gabby on the Tue 13 July 2010 a 10:33pm
i feel the same way you do! 100%! i hate being the only one! i was born with club foot on my left foot. im 14 and im afraid i will never be able to find a boyfriend either! im afraid that i will always be alone because of this. i get very upset. and i feel like this will never go away. your story really helped me!